I’ve been trying to encourage my kids to behave better, and I’ve heard that praise can be a good tool. But I’m not sure if I’m doing it right. Sometimes it seems to work, other times not so much. Anyone have tips on how to praise kids in a way that actually motivates good behavior? What works and what doesn’t? Looking for practical advice from parents or teachers who’ve figured this out.
In our house, we’ve had success with a mix of verbal praise and small rewards for good behavior. For example, when the kids help set the table without being asked, we might let them choose a fun activity after dinner.
We also try to catch them being good and point it out. Like if they’re playing nicely together, we’ll say something about how we love seeing them get along so well.
It’s not a perfect system, but we’ve noticed they seem more motivated to pitch in and be helpful. The key has been consistency and making sure the praise feels genuine. They can tell when we’re just saying things to say them.
Overall, it’s been a positive way to reinforce the behaviors we want to see more of.
I’ve found being specific about my kid’s good behavior makes praise more meaningful. Instead of a generic ‘good job,’ I might say, ‘I noticed how carefully you folded the clothes.’ It helps my child connect the praise to the behavior.
I also try focusing on effort rather than results. When my kid struggles with a chore but persists, I mention their persistence. While it isn’t perfect, it encourages them to keep trying even when things get challenging.
I’ve noticed my kids respond better to specific praise. Saying ‘nice job cleaning your room’ works better than just ‘good job.’ Praise for effort, not just results, has helped too. My 9-year-old tries harder when I point out his persistence.
I learned that praise works best when it’s genuine and focused on the process. With my kids, I noticed they responded well when I pointed out specific things they did. For instance, ‘You did a great job remembering to put your dishes in the dishwasher without being asked.’
It took some practice, but I started looking for small moments to acknowledge their efforts. Even when the results weren’t perfect, praising their attempt encouraged them to keep trying. My daughter once spent ages organizing her closet. It wasn’t perfect, but I made sure to tell her how impressed I was with her dedication.
Over time, this approach seemed to boost their confidence and motivation. They started taking more initiative with chores and schoolwork. It wasn’t an overnight change, but consistent, thoughtful praise made a real difference in our home. 
I’ve been trying different ways to praise my 5-year-old. Sometimes I say things like ‘Great job putting your toys away!’ but I’m not sure if that’s enough.
I’m curious how others make praise more meaningful. Do you find your kids respond better to certain types of praise? Or do you combine praise with other strategies?
Recently, I started pointing out when my child puts in extra effort, like ‘You worked so hard on that puzzle!’ It seems to encourage them, but I’d love to hear what’s worked long-term for other parents.
Any advice on balancing praise with other ways to motivate good behavior?