I’ve been trying to encourage my kids to behave better, and I’ve heard praise can be a good tool. But I’m not sure if I’m doing it right. Sometimes it seems to work, other times not so much. Any tips on how to praise kids in a way that actually motivates them? I don’t want to overdo it or say the wrong things. Just looking for some practical advice from other parents or people who work with kids. Thanks!
I’ve been experimenting with praise too. My 5-year-old loves it when I notice little things, like putting their shoes away. But sometimes I worry I’m overdoing it.
I try to point out when they’ve worked hard on something, even if the result isn’t perfect. Like when they struggle to zip up their coat but keep trying.
Does anyone find their kids start to expect praise for everything? Or lose interest if you praise too much? I’m still figuring out the right balance.
What about praising in public vs private? My child seems to react differently depending on who’s around. Curious how others handle this.
You know, I’ve been through the praise rollercoaster with my teens. When they were younger, I’d go overboard with the “good job!” for every little thing. It backfired. They started expecting praise for breathing.
Now, I try to notice their efforts more naturally. Like when my 14-year-old struggled with a tough math problem but didn’t give up, I mentioned how impressed I was with his persistence. Or when my 17-year-old helped her brother without being asked, I told her it was really kind.
I found that pointing out specific actions or efforts works better than general praise. It shows them I’m really paying attention. And you know what? They seem to value that more than constant “atta-boys”. 
It took some trial and error, but finding that balance made a big difference in how they responded to praise.
In our house, we focus on praising effort and specific actions. For example, when my 10-year-old tidies up without being asked, I might say, “I noticed you put all your toys away. That really helps keep our home nice.”
We also try to make praise sincere and not overdo it. Kids can tell when you’re just saying something to say it. I find that being specific about what they did well helps them understand what behaviors we value.
One thing that’s worked well is letting the kids ‘catch’ us being good too. They love to point out when we do something helpful or kind. It turns praise into a fun family game and shows them we’re all working on being our best selves together.
My kids respond best to specific praise. I noticed they put more effort into tasks when I point out exactly what they did well.
I try to keep praise brief and natural. Too much can feel overwhelming or insincere to them.
In our house, we’ve had some success turning chores into games. My kid loves timing themselves to see how fast they can put away laundry or set the table. We also use a chart where they can earn stickers for completed tasks, which they can trade in for small rewards or privileges.
I’ve found it helpful to give choices about when or how to do chores. Like asking if they want to vacuum before or after dinner. This gives them a sense of control and makes the task feel less like a chore.
What strategies have worked for other parents? I’m always looking for new ideas to keep things fresh and engaging.