I’ve been reading about different parenting approaches and keep seeing positive reinforcement mentioned as a way to help kids become more resilient. I get the basic idea of praising good behavior, but I’m not entirely clear on how this actually builds resilience in children. Can someone explain the connection? Like, does it help them handle setbacks better or build confidence to try new things? Would love to understand the psychology behind it if anyone has insights or experience with this.
From what I’ve seen with my own teens, positive reinforcement really does help kids bounce back from tough situations. When my daughter was around 10, she struggled with math and would just shut down whenever she got a problem wrong. I started focusing on her effort instead of just the right answers. I’d say things like “I noticed you kept trying even when that was hard” or “You figured out a different way to solve that.”
What happened over time was pretty interesting. She started seeing mistakes as part of learning instead of failures. Now at 17, when she faces challenges at school or with friends, she doesn’t give up as quickly. She learned that struggling doesn’t mean she’s not capable.
With my younger son, I noticed that when I acknowledged his persistence with chores or homework, he became more willing to tackle things that seemed difficult. It’s like the positive feedback taught him that his efforts matter, not just perfect results.
I think it works because kids internalize those encouraging messages. They start to believe they can handle hard things because someone noticed their strengths. It builds up their confidence to keep trying when life gets tough. 