I’ve been thinking about different ways to teach my kids to be more responsible and I keep going back and forth between using rewards vs consequences. Some people swear by positive reinforcement like praise or small rewards when kids do their chores or homework without being asked. Others say that punishment or taking things away works better because it teaches real consequences.
I’m curious what others have experienced. Does one approach actually work better than the other for building long-term responsibility? Or is it more about the individual kid? Would love to hear what’s worked (or hasn’t worked) for other parents.
I tried the reward chart thing for a while but my kid just started doing the bare minimum to get the prize. Now I mostly just notice when things get done without making a big deal about it. Sometimes I’ll mention how nice the clean room looks or thank them for helping out. The punishment route felt exhausting for both of us honestly. I think kids pick up on whether you actually appreciate their help or if you’re just going through the motions.
We use both depending on the situation. Natural consequences work well for my kids, like forgetting lunch means being hungry. Praise definitely motivates them more than threats though. They seem to remember the good feedback longer.