I’ve been thinking about this with my kids lately. I sometimes give them verbal praise when they do something good, and other times I might offer a small treat or extra screen time. Both seem to have a positive effect, but I’m curious about what other parents find more effective in the long run. Does one method tend to work better than the other for reinforcing good behavior? I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences.
My kid goes through phases with what motivates him. Last month it was all about earning points for a new video game, but now he lights up when I tell him how proud I am of his effort. I’ve found combining both works best. When he helps with the dishes without being asked, I mention how helpful he’s being and let him stay up an extra 15 minutes. The praise hits differently when there’s something concrete attached.
My kids respond differently depending on the situation. My younger one gets excited about an extra bedtime story when she cleans up. My older kid cares more about hearing exactly what he did right.
Sometimes I combine both. When my daughter helped her brother with his backpack, I told her how caring she was AND let her pick our weekend movie. It felt natural and meaningful.
Both methods work. Praise helps them understand what they did right, while small rewards make it feel special. My kids remember the praise longer, but tangible rewards definitely get them to try new things.
Honestly, mixing both works best with my two teens. When my younger one was 8, tangible rewards like extra screen time or picking dinner really motivated her. She needed that concrete “prize” to get the connection between good behavior and positive outcomes.
My older son responded better to praise, especially when I got specific about what he did well. Instead of “good job,” I’d say “I noticed you helped your sister with homework without being asked.”
What surprised me was how their preferences changed as they got older. My daughter now values recognition more than treats, while my son sometimes appreciates earning privileges for bigger accomplishments. 
Timing matters too. Immediate praise works great for everyday moments, but tangible rewards can be powerful for bigger goals or establishing new habits. The trick is not making everything about rewards or they’ll start expecting something every time they do the right thing.
Praise tends to have a longer-lasting impact. While treats are nice, they can create dependency. Verbal recognition feels more genuine and encourages kids to keep up the good behavior.
Still figuring this out with my child. We use sticker charts for toy cleanup, and I express my happiness when they help. My child responds to both methods, but I’m concerned the stickers might be creating too much expectation. Have you noticed any age where kids prioritize praise over rewards? Is it a good time to start moving away from tangible rewards or is it still okay at this age?