I’m looking for some advice on getting my children to complete their chores and homework without me having to remind them all the time. I’ve attempted various methods, but none seem to last.
What incentives or reward systems have proven successful in your experiences? I’m interested in understanding what motivates kids and how you make it work consistently as a parent. It would be great to hear what has worked for you and your family.
One thing that really helped us was switching from rewards to natural consequences. My 14-year-old used to forget to take out the trash, so I stopped reminding her. When it piled up and started smelling, she figured out pretty quickly that it was her job.
With homework, we had a rule that electronics go away at a certain time each night until assignments are finished. No arguing or negotiating. They could choose to get it done early and have more free time, or wait and lose that time.
What surprised me was how much better this worked than constantly offering rewards. My kids started taking ownership instead of just waiting for me to bribe them. The 17-year-old even started doing things ahead of time to avoid the hassle.
It wasn’t instant though. There were definitely some rough weeks where I had to stick to my guns while they tested the new system. But once they realized I wasn’t going back to nagging and reminding, things got much smoother 
We’re dealing with something similar here. My child responds well to earning small privileges like choosing what we watch together or staying up 15 minutes later on weekends.
I tried sticker charts but they lost interest pretty quickly. What seems to work better is letting them pick their own reward from a few options I give them.
But honestly, some weeks are better than others. I’m curious if anyone has found ways to keep kids motivated when the novelty wears off? And how do you balance rewards with just expecting them to help because they’re part of the family?
We tried a bunch of different approaches and honestly what clicked for my kid was making it feel more like earning privileges than getting rewards. She can earn extra time with friends or choosing the weekend movie by keeping up with her stuff during the week.
What really helped was letting her track her own progress on a simple calendar. She marks off days when she gets things done without me asking. Seeing those marks add up seems to motivate her more than me keeping track of everything.
Some weeks are definitely better than others though.
Linking privileges to responsibilities worked for us. If they want to hang out with friends, chores need to be done first. No need for daily nagging, just the simple rule that fun follows work. It took about two weeks for them to get the hang of it.
We started using a simple sticker chart where my kids can earn points for doing things without being asked. Each task has different point values - making their bed might be 2 points, but doing homework without reminders is worth 5.
Once they collect enough points, they can pick from a little reward box I keep stocked with small things like extra screen time, choosing what’s for dinner, or a special outing just with me.
What really surprised me was how excited they get about the actual stickers and seeing their progress grow. My younger one especially loves showing off her chart to visitors 
The trick for us has been letting them help choose what goes in the reward box so they feel more invested in earning towards something they actually want.