I’m looking for ideas on how to positively reinforce good behavior in kids. What methods have worked well for you? I’ve tried a few things but I’m not sure if I’m doing it right. Any tips on praising or rewarding kids in a way that actually motivates them would be really helpful. Thanks!
I’ve been trying different things with my 5-year-old to encourage good behavior. We started a simple points system where they earn stars for helping out or being kind.
At first I used small treats as rewards, but that didn’t work great long-term. Now we’re experimenting with a jar of activity ideas they can choose from when they earn enough points. Things like extra park time or picking our weekend movie.
I’m still figuring it out though. Some days my kid seems super excited about earning points and other days they just don’t seem to care. I’m curious if you’ve noticed the same or if switching up the rewards helps keep the momentum. What has been your experience?
I can relate to your search for effective ways to encourage good behavior. When my kids were younger, I started with a simple point system. They earned points for simple tasks like making their bed or helping set the table. It wasn’t fancy, just a sheet on the fridge where we kept track of their progress.
What really worked for us was letting them choose their own rewards. My daughter liked staying up a bit later on weekends, while my son preferred extra video game time. It took some trial and error, but finding rewards they cared about truly boosted our routine.
One thing I learned the hard way is to be cautious with material rewards since they can lose their appeal quickly. I found that genuine praise and spending one-on-one time together were often more motivating over time. It’s not a perfect system, but it has helped us build better habits over the years. 
In our house, we’ve found that a simple chart system works wonders. The kids earn stickers for things like cleaning their rooms or helping with chores. Once they collect enough stickers, they can pick a small reward from a jar of options we came up with together.
We also try to catch them being good and give specific praise. Like ‘I saw how you helped your brother tie his shoes. That was really kind of you!’ It seems to motivate them more than general compliments.
For bigger accomplishments, we might plan a special outing or activity they enjoy. The key has been keeping it low-key and consistent. It’s not perfect, but we’ve seen improvements in their behavior over time.
Sticker charts worked for us. Kids pick tasks, earn stickers, trade for small rewards.
Specific praise helps too. ‘Great job putting your toys away without being asked!’
Sometimes a special outing as a reward. Keeps them motivated without going overboard.
In our home, we’ve had success with a ‘chore challenge’ approach. Each week, I write tasks on colorful slips of paper and put them in a jar. My kid gets to pick a few each day, which adds an element of surprise.
We keep a whiteboard to track completed tasks. At the end of the week, we tally up the points and choose a fun family activity as a reward. It’s not perfect, but it’s helped make chores feel less like a chore and more like a game we play together.